“I can’t commit right now, I have other priorities at the moment.”

I think we all wish every­one would be more upfront before get­ting involved. Let­ting some­one know your wants and needs before get­ting involved is help­ful. Say­ing things some­one wants to hear for your own per­sonal gain can only make things worse. Like many oth­ers, I have done these things. I have been the guy, who wasn’t hon­est, lead­ing some­one on. Know­ing I wasn’t ready to get involved with any­one, still I wasn’t hon­est with her or myself and ended up hurt­ing some­one. Was it my pur­suit for hap­pi­ness that had me tempted to do some­thing that I wasn’t ready for? On the other hand, was it my self­ish­ness that ended up hurt­ing some­one? Either way, when I had a chance to say, “No,” I made a com­mit­ment to some­one know­ing I had other pri­or­i­ties that I was more inter­ested in. Many peo­ple will say, “This is the chance you take with rela­tion­ships,” but should you ever take a chance on some­one who isn’t look­ing for any­thing seri­ous when you are? Are you set­ting your­self up for fail­ure? That’s why we should be hon­est with peo­ple, hurt­ing them shouldn’t be some­thing you want to do. By being dis­hon­est it’s some­thing you will do.

Still, many of us have a prob­lem with the word “No.” I doesn’t mat­ter if some­one tells us, or we have to tell some­one, the word “No” is some­thing we don’t want to hear or say. If you’re not ready to com­mit, it’s ok, have fun and do your thing, but make sure your being hon­est with the indi­vid­u­als you’re see­ing. Say­ing, “No I’m not look­ing for a rela­tion­ship right now,” is ok. Com­mit­ting to a rela­tion­ship takes self con­trol, you have to be ready to do the right thing at all times. If you’re not ready or you’re focused on other things where you can’t give a 100% in a rela­tion­ship, why get involved? Many of us do and look where we end up, alone with are priorities.

Ques­tion: Why aren’t peo­ple hon­est with oth­ers before they get involved?